In every other cover story I have written, the artist I am profiling has been promoting something: a new record, a brand, or some noteworthy life change. I like that in this one, Bladee isn’t.

I half-seriously wondered—something to do with that conspiracy theory about shape-shifting reptoids, or a harbinger of the toad on the cover of last year’s Psykos with Yung Lean? From his living room ...